Ron's Dark (Lord) Secret
by EEL's Bad Fanfictions
Summary: This is if Peter Pettigrew was actually Voldemort. Ron finds out and they become infatuated. This takes place during their sixth year. Warning: slash fanfic. One shot. EEL owns nothing. All of it is Queen Rowling. We obviously respect her work and hopes she loves this tender scene.


Synopsis: This is if Peter Pettigrew was actually Voldemort. Ron finds out and they become infatuated. This takes place during their sixth year. Warning: slash fanfic. One shot. EEL owns nothing. All of it is Queen Rowling. We obviously respect her work and hopes she loves this tender scene.

"Ron," Harry Potter questioned. "Are you okay?"

Ron turned almost as red as his flaming hair.

"Yeah," he answered nonchalant. "I'm doing fine."

He brushed his fingers against his lips, right where the Dark Lord tenderly kissed him the night before. The secret burned within him. His rat that he had slept with for many years was actually the charming, gorgeous and utterly hot Dark Lord by the name of Voldemort. Voldy, Ron thought. He planned to write that amazing name in his textbooks with a little heart.

"Ron?" Harry inquired. "You look distracted. I hope it's not me."

Harry smiled a charming smile.

Ron grinned. No, it wasn't Harry, but it was another dark secret for another once, dark haired man.

Ron had always thought he loved Hermione, but the Dark Lord showed his true self and therefore showed him otherwise. Ron started thinking of his and Voldy's ship name. Roldemort. Perfect, Ron thought. What a beautiful name for a beautiful couple.

Later Ron rushed to bed to greet his one, true, rodenty lover.

And there he was! The Dark Lord was in his small, furry, animagus form. He lay across the pillow in an alluring state.

Ron grinned from ear to ear.

"Hello," he whispered seductively.

He could never flirt with Hermione. But, with the handsome rat in front of him, it was easy.

"I thought you wouldn't be coming tonight." The rat, now man, said slyly.

Ron giggled. "You know I come here every night. To sleep… and even more."

Voldy gasped. He pulled a silken rose out from his heavy, charcoal though silky, robes. "Come here," He said in sultry tones. Voldy beckoned to the red-haired boy, alluringly, with his pale, spider-like hands… so unlike Donald Trump's.

Ron giggled again. He could not help his hormones. Ron crawled into bed, wiggled up close to his stick thin bae. He bit the rose, their lips tenderly and briefly connecting. They pulled away. Now Ron gripped the rose between his plush, pink lips.

Suddenly, there was a bang from behind them.

Ron whipped around as his dark lover turned back to rodent form.

Seamus Finnigan stumbled into the darkened room. He gasped at the scene before him.

Ron lay in bed with a rodent. A beautiful, red rose was gripped firmly between Ron's pouty lips.

Seamus slowly backed away. He could not erase the image burned into his retinas. Part of him wished to… part of him did not. It was so tender, yet so wrong….

Hermione would be so disappointed… her love was stolen by a rat and pale murderer, Ron thought as he turned to the sweet (now) man lying before him.

Their lips connected once again. This time with more force. They held the position, embracing each other with loving arms.

"Stop," Ron suddenly broke away from the passionate kiss. "This is wrong. What if Dumbledore finds out? I can't bare to turn you in."

Voldy placed one of his long fingers to his full lips. "Don't worry, no one need know what we're up to."

Ron frowned; he could not help but be worried about his lover's ability to have no worry about their illegal relationship.

"But," Ron protested, looking deeply into his secret boyfriend's scarlet, red orbs. "Not only is this relationship illegal because you're a wanted, murderous criminal, you're also decades older than I!" The ginger teen's voice cracked. "Voldy," he gasped. "You were practically born in a different century!"

The rat man drew away from his young beloved. "Are you not willing to risk possible execution to be with me?" he asked, keeping the eye-contact the ginger had started.

"I- I don't know," the mid-pubescent boy cried, looking away. "I love you so much, yet I am so afraid!"

Meanwhile, Seamus Finnigan, the one who had happened upon the wrongful affair, hurried to the headmasters oaken office.

"Headmaster," he shouted when he got there. "You would not believe what I saw."

"What is it?" asked the wise, old man in the chair.

"The Weasley boy lay seductively in bed with a rat!"

"Hhm," The headmaster considered this. "I always knew that Ginny one was a little strange."

"Uh, sir," Seamus stuttered, momentarily distracted. "I said boy."

"Isn't Ginerva a boy?"

"No, I don't think so."

"Oh, well then. Which one was it? Was it the ho- I mean, handsome one, Bill?" Dumbledore reddened under his beard.

"He left," Seamus said plainly.

"You don't say," the headmaster said morosely. "Spit it out! Now I'll finally have something to talk about at the cool teachers' table."

"Sir, it was Ronald, the youngest son of the Weasleys."  
"Ginerva?"

"No!" Seamus screamed in frustration. "We've been over this. Ronald Weasley is sleeping with a rat!"

"Do you have something against beastiality? You know, we like to have open minds at Hogwarts".

"Sir! Are you not going to do anything about it!"  
"What?" Dumbledore gasped, aghast. "You're willing to disrupt the unholy, matrimony scene you stumbled upon?"

"Yes! They may bring out their wands!"

The old headmaster blushed again.

"Ah, yes. Like I did with Bill…."

"You cursed Bill Weasley?"

"Yes, you could say that."

"How are you still headmaster?" The sandy haired boy sputtered in utter confusion.

"None of the other teachers know what I'm up to." Dumbledore said with a flirtatious wink; twirling his beard seductively around his long index finger.

Seamus stared dumbly at the old man in front of him, shook his head and returned to the problem that brought him to the headmasters office.

"Sir, we must go now." He said urgently.

"Fine, let's go see if we can..." the old headmaster paused to dwell in the past. "Stop them."

They moved toward the door.

Back in the Gryffindor dorm room Ron started to weep helplessly.

"I'm just so scared!" He cried into the skeletal man's shoulder.

"Please, don't cry," Voldemort said despairingly. "I love you and that's what really matters."

Ron brightened a little when his rodenty beloved said that.

"We should run away." The ginger said suddenly.

Voldemort gasped at the boy in front of him. "WHAT?" He shouted, a little too loudly.

"Hush!" Ron gasped, he pressed a finger against the lipless man's mouth. "They might hear us… but do you," the ginger male hesitated. "Want to?"

"Yes!" exclaimed Voldemort. "Let us make haste to leave this God forsaken, awful, prison of a school and scrawny excuse of a room."

Ron's eyebrows shot up into his hairline. "You told me you liked the decor," the boy pouted with a sultry glare.

"I might have fibbed a bit." Voldemort shrugged.

"Okay, we should go now."

"Let's leave out the window."

"But we'll land on the ground and die."

Voldemort gazed at his young love's plush face. "Don't worry my little poppy. I can fly and carry you in my strong arms."

The two hastened to the window as Ron straddled the Dark Lord's back as his black-robed lover kicked out the window pane.

Just at that moment Seamus and Dumbledore burst into the room.

"Jump now!" Ron shrilly screamed in terror.

The forbidden lovers launched themselves out into the dark night as Ron clung desperately to Voldy's strong back.

Seamus and Dumbledore raced to the window.

"So wrong… yet so right," the sandy haired, young man whispered.

(A/N): This is a joke


End file.
